[commentary] finding you in the fault lines of my heart

[tovizu]

title: finding you in the fault lines of my heart
rating: teen
pairing: Hsu Nientsu/Kamimoto Kotone
word count: 18,292

OVERALL
wanted to do a really brief commentary for all my major past fics before i start getting updated on all the new ones. so, of course, i had to start with this!

i started this fic out in the summer and it was my very first major writing project in a long time (as in at least around 5 years). i was really nervous about posting this--i was still really getting to know the members we had at the time. so, for the characterization, i spent a lot of time trying to research and watch signals to get a feel for the vibes. i wish i had done this a whole lot sooner, as i'm sure i had a lot more thoughts when this work was first posted back in july of 2024--which is still insane--but this will have to do.

this was meant to be the prequel for an au with all the girls in a band because i have brainworms. however, despite this being the supposed prequel to this series, i wrote it with the intentions of having it be able to sit as a standalone in the case that i can't bring myself to making the au. which... unfortunately seems like will be the case, as i haven't had much inspiration to really fully flesh the rest of the universe out (though i had a lot of notes).

the main bulk of this is that it was an incredibly self-indulgent au for myself because, at the time, these two didn't even have a tag to begin with. my goal for this was mainly to make a feel-good fluffy almost romcom vibe for the fic! and, i just had a lot of fun making kotone be a gay disaster + all the little teasing bits we get from the obligatory snarky best friend--which would be sheon/suyeon in this case. 


ABOUT BAND ROLES:
i had to do a bit of research on different roles in a band as my only knowledge comes from anime girls in bands and other similar media (whoops). but, some of their positions and instruments that they play are reflective of their roles in the band, to an extent. 

for example: besides the fact that sohyun has brought up wanting to learn bass on fromm, the bass is a pretty essential piece when it comes to music as it highlights and reinforces the chord progressions. to me, it's kinda like the glue of the music--gives it that little oomph that we get while blasting shit in the car. and, sohyun has the most connections to everyone in the band! in my mind, she's the first one that seoyeon and nien grab to be in the band, and while nien does find naky first, sohyun is still already friends with her. she's also the one who brings kotone! so on and so forth. 

with nakyoung, the rhythm guitarist also works with bass and drums from what i vaguely remember about my 3am research spirals while writing this--so i thought it made the most sense to have both nakyoung and sohyun be the main leaders for AAA, besides the fact that they're also the oldest. in terms of her contributions to the plot, i didn't want her to be a one off/one-liner type but with all the heavy focus on konichiwaz, i didn't get throw much in on her character--although, if i could add more, i'd want to show more of her goofy side! this whole band is deeply unserious. naky is no exception! (also gave myself a major pat on the back when we got a naky electric guitar solo for the showcase, haha.) 

seoyeon - sadly not too much to say on this! she's the lead guitarist because #first girl things and idk, i think it just makes sense for her to be sort of the main highlight when people watch them perform. i had more plotted for her in the sequel but... i've already talked about how that's going

as for nien, i think putting her on the drums was a bit of a no-brainer. the drums usually dictate the tempo (to my knowledge) and require a lot of coordination/full body energy. we also see this with kotone too, as she takes the lead most of the time throughout this fic. in the band, because she and seoyeon reach out to sohyun first, i imagined that they were a pretty solid trio before all this. the bass and drums work pretty closely together, so it all worked out! 

last, and certainly not least, kotone! essentially, i wanted this to be the final piece the band needed--since the piano does the harmony and melody and can basically back up all the other instruments! i know i didn't highlight the actual bands or songs that they played in the fic, but, kotone here does care about her playing a lot. the piano (to me) seems rather meticulous at times, and it felt right haha. 

SPECIFIC SCENES: 
my favorite scenes had to be writing their little date by the han river (loosely based on SSSignal 230528), their almost kiss, and (of course) their confession. 

the han river date :( ohhhh my 1311, how i love you so. there's something so sweet and intimate about the vibes of a date (or i suppose "not-date" in the fic) walking along the river and sharing food. that SSSignal is also the one that really got me obsessed with konichiwaz and their dynamics. so, naturally, i had to pay a little homage to it in my very first work for them (and the tag?!)

the almost kiss! that scene was actually one of the first ones i wrote/planned from the very beginning. what's a little romance without a tense almost kiss that gets interrupted by other people? just peak cinema to me. 

the confession. honestly, i could not stop giggling while writing this part. everything about it was so so so self indulgent. down to the fact that they kiss multiple times, because seriously, why do we always only get one kiss!! even though i personally struggle with writing kiss scenes (i always have to take many breaks), i know that it's well worth it for reading so.. i just suffer through and edit later. besides, the way nien asks for the kiss again? if i was kotone, i also would fold right then and there. 

honorable mention to the car scene where they accidentally brush hands because everybody talks by neon trees is personally my theme song for this fic! 


MY FAVORITE QUOTES:
i wasn't sure how to end this but i wanted to log some of my favorite quotes from here. humor (especially the bad jokes), unfortunately all comes from me and my sense of humor. do with that what you will </3. if you made it this far, thanks for reading my rambling. 

the entire scene referencing seoyeon's fromm and how she touches nien's lips. sunnyz queerbait is always funny to me so if i get the chance to have them do it, i will! 

“Is there a particular reason as to why you look like you’re a kicked, sopping wet puppy in a tattered cardboard box with shitty illegible sharpie writing that I happened to find on my doorstep?”

in my mind, sohyun was like the nice friend that tries to give you good advice and suyeon here is the friend that still gives you good advice but makes fun of you while doing so. 

“DID YOU JUST LICK ME?”

Nien just grins. “What? I thought you were into that?”

"I mean…”

Sohyun blinks once. “A quadruple??? Why don’t you guys just say poly–”

i just thought this one was silly and i giggled when i wrote it. 

“Enough.” Nakyoung, on the other hand, is not amused. “What the.. Acid Angels from Asia?? What kind of fucking name is that?”

the irony of nakyoung being the only one actually in the AAA subunit and hating the name was a little too funny to me. i also just couldn't think up of a band name for the life of me, which is honestly how that whole conversation made it into the fic in the first place